Smitty's Morning Afterthoughts: 1 down, 3 to go.

Last night on the field, D.C. showed us all that while they may have been a let down on the field, some of their players proved they would reign supreme over the Crew players in the blogosphere. I mean, in just one 90-minute span, D.C. posted three times, while the Crew only posted once.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....HAHAHAHAHA.....HAHAHA....HEHE....*tear*....hehe....*ahem*...Ah, that felt good.

But in all seriousness, how bad must it suck to be a D.C. fan? Before the game, you have to hand over the Supporter's Shield, reaffirming that your season didn't go the way you'd hoped; during the game, your team, which had to win to get into the playoffs, butchers every chance they have, including a trifecta of posters; Brad Evans, who gets in done down on the farm, scores what one MLS coach (okay, it was his own) calls the goal of the year; Brian Carrol, who you gave away for nothing, rubs all his nastiness in your face before hoisting the same Supporter's Shield he helped you win last year.

And to top it off, after the game, you have to drive back to Fallujah, errr, Washington D.C. But hey, on the brightside, at least you didn't make like Toronto fans and parade through the streets before getting bounced from the playoffs.

Crew fans, on the other hand, found yet another thing to celebrate last night. For the first time in Nordecke history, someone named Clark Hunt not only witnessed our Massive section, but he actually compared it to a World Cup atmosphere. From Fighting Canary Orinthologist and Massive Dispatch Columnist Michael Arace's superlative column:

Clark Hunt: "At one point during the game, my brother and I were standing on the stage there and we both said the same thing: 'Boy, this is just like being at a World Cup game.' Now, it's not quite as big, but it had that same feel."

By the way, Clarkie fails to mention that right after that, both of their eyes glazed over and turned into dollar signs at the thought that the Crew could fill that stadium every week with a team this good.

Shawn Mitchell also did a bang-up job, getting the Hunt heir on record about how he feels about moving the Black and Gold:

"We think Columbus can continue to be one of the cornerstone franchises in this league. The best way to state it directly is to say that I'm confident the Columbus Crew will be playing in Columbus, Ohio, for at least the next 50 years."

That's refreshing to hear. Now, this doesn't mean I believe I'll be 76 before I hear another peep about the Crew ever packing up and leaving town, but at least we have a the Hunt who runs the show saying he's cool with Columbus. To put it another way, you could say he's "For the 6-1-4." Or that's he'd "Go Gay for the Short North" (hey, who wouldn't!?) The point here is that next season, if some idiot Toronto fan gets pippy about the Crew moving, we can point to the guy in charge of calling the movers, and remind them he's "all 'bout Bexley", or "Lusty for Linden-McKinley" (again, who isn't?!), or whichever clever voter-registering slogan you prefer.

But last night was about more than showcasing everyone's love for our Massive Banana. It was about uniting the old with the new. The Crew dropped one of it's staunchest playoff foes, making like Parkside for many Black and Gold faithful who had drunken the haterade over the last few years, believing there was no reason to come back to the first SSS in U.S. history (by the way, the healing begins the minute you call 447-CREW. Ask for Avin.) But at the same time the Crew were winning back their old fans with a D.C. smackdown, they were creating an army of new fans. When I got into work today, I had emails from multiple friends who finally made it out to their first game. They loved the goal, loved the Nordecke, and all wanted to know one thing: Has this been going on all year?

Yes, my friends, it has. And it's going to keep happening. As the Nordecke reminded it's celebrating denizens last night, "We're Not Done Yet." And that's fer DAMN sure...

OTHER NOTES:

- The guy who dressed up in the Massive Banana costume yesterday deserves a prize, or at the very least, a Crewzer. Maybe when New England comes to town (if they make it that far), we should throw him at Kheli Dube. What?

- Shoutouts need to go to Thoma Gol from the Big Soccer boards, who makes all those great banners like the "Semper Columbus" and "In It to Win It" beauties. The same laudings should be doled out to the little kid who faithfully tapes up his MLS Cup banner every week. What is he, like, eight? And yet, he's running laps around 99% of the Nordecke (Thoma excepted) when it comes to artistic ability and guts. Someone should buy him a beer. In 13 years.

- For the first time all year, I noticed the "Brad Evans, Down on the Farm" banner, which is almost directly behind the Crew bench. Someone in our section asked, "Is that new, or has it always been there?" I responded that it is indeed not new, but is from last year. I know this only because last year, I remember looking at that banner and asking "Who the hell is Brad Evans?" My, the differene a year makes.

Also, this last paragraph cost me my quotation allowance for the week. Let's see how we do for the rest of the column.

- I take great pride in the fact that when Dante Washington walks by, I don't ask who he is, or why he gets to go to the front of the Nordecke. I just smile and nod.

- Does anyone else think Patrick Crayton (the D.C. 'keeper) is kind of funny looking? I almost felt bad for him. He had Jeff Cunningham's head on Zach Thornton's body. Also, there was some high comedy when he completely fell over in agony after Male Nurse Khumalo clanged that sitter off the crossbar. People around me were asking what happened to him. His reaction looked like something Zapruder would have been filming.

- Jehrico, Blake, and myself, having exquisite taste in music, television, and all things awesome, have decided to become the official chant-writing machine of the Nordecke and Crew Supporters. We're filling this void, because without us, you might be stuck chanting how much you love "sweet Molly Malloo". God help us. Last night we came up with some strokes of genius, namely a new Gino Padula chant. It is to the tune of the "I Dream of Genie" theme song. For those of you who never experienced "Nick at Nite" growing up, it was a show about a hot genie who lived in 60's suburbia, and got away with way more exposed flesh on T.V. than one would have expected for a "family show."

Anyway, the song goes like this:

Gi-no, Gino Padula
Gi-no, Gino Padula
Gi-no, Gino Padula
BAP...BA-DABA DA BAP!

Gi-no, Gino Padula
Gi-no, Gino...(you get the idea.)

Also, Jehrico was the one who came up with the ever poignant alt-country crooner:

You can stick your can of Red Bull up your ass!
You can stick your can of Red Bull up your ass!
You can stick your can of Red Bull,
You can stick your can of Red Bull,
You can stick your can of Red Bull up your ass!

It never caught on, but if by some stroke of luck, the Energy Drinks make it to L.A., we must use it.

- Kudos go out to whoever came up with the "Frankie's Friends 2008" badges, and then passed them out for free. Unless they weren't free, in which case I DEFINITELY paid for mine.

- If the Crew don't get at least a 4-page special section previewing the playoffs, along with a season retrospective, in Friday's Dispatch, I will not be happy. Further, if 1460 the Fan doesn't mention the Crew this week, with the Buckeyes having a bye week, and the Blue Jackets dropping more points than the Nasdaq (awe snap!), I will personally kidnap Chris Spielman and torture him by making him watch the World Series, U of M highlights, and PBS. Or if I wanted him to really suffer, I could just show him a replay of the Penn State and USC games.

In stark contrast to the lack of coverage on 1460, 610 AM has a football show on Sunday Mornings. This week one of the commentators made the joke that the Crew are scoring more often than the Buckeyes. Laugh all you want, but it's really becoming true.

- Yes, I paid $25 for a Supporter's Shield t-shirt. And no, I'm not washing it until we give up the Shield. And yes, I'll be wearing it Saturday, along with my lucky Crew Banana Hammock.

- Just think, as chilly as it was yesterday, this time next year, we could be playing a home game or two in weather much colder that 60 degrees. Champions League Fever (TM)! Catch it, then take an antibiotic.

- Okay, I'll just say it. I think the Supporter's Shield looks like the Pontiac logo. Possible sponsorship tie-in? The irony here is that with an infusion of cash that a sponsorship would bring, we could afford to have a trophy that doesn't look like, well, the Pontiac logo.

- If you want to have fun, go watch the replay of the game posted on MLS Net, and listen to the D.C. broadcasters, mainly play-by-play guy Dave Johnson. Grab your favorite beverage, and have a drinking game revolving around how many times he says "Oh My..." If your drink is anything stronger than Natty Light, you'll be dead of alcohol poisoning by minute 17.

Finally, let's all just relax and enjoy this thing before Saturday, because once that whistle blows, it will be a white-knuckle ride to the finish.