Dear Canada,
I know usually it's intelligent, eclectic Canadians lecturing us poor, inbred Americans about how to be more multi-cultural and politically correct. The dichotomy has been in place (at least in your minds) for some time now, and I know that by writing this letter, I might very well be nudging your poorly balanced egos even further off the deep end than they already sit. However, you need an intervention.
Last night at BMO field, some of your country's "soccer fans" booed not one, but two national anthems (England and the US). In fact, some even started singing the Canadian anthem OVER the US anthem. (This has happened before by the way, specifically at Crew Stadium, where many of your fans stated they couldn't hear the singer of the US national anthem from the loudspeakers. I believed you then, but now I'm not so sure...) To add to the absurdity, today many people are trying to coddle you, and make you feel better. Somehow, despite what happened, the fans at the game are somehow the victims. Reporters are saying "there was a mixup," that the Canadians thought their anthem would not be played. ESPN has actually tried to help further, adding that they "take the blame" for the mixup, presumably because they want to try to make this all seem like a terrible misunderstanding, instead of what it really is.
A revealing glimpse into the true thinking of most Canadian soccer fans.
Instead of showing the entire soccer-viewing continent what class fans you have, Canadian and Toronto fans in specific showed that their attitude is essentially that of a whiny teen on "My Super Sweet 16." When it was thought that no Canadian anthem was going to be played, many started booing the proceedings. Some fans tried to make things more "positive" by singing over another country's national anthem. These anthems are sung by people from those countries, and the anthems can still be sung because in most cases, people died defending their country's right to have an anthem. These anthems, whether you are from the country or not, are special, because of what it took to make them. But in Toronto, these anthems are only special and to be revered as long as everyone has to sit through your anthem as well. Instead of appreciating the countries represented, the fans at last night's ASG felt that if they could not celebrate their country, then no one else should get to either. Way to roll out the welcome mat.
Many Canadians are saying it was OK to sing or boo because their anthem was not getting played. If I can ask a question...what makes Toronto fans think they are entitled to having the national anthem played at this game to begin with? I realize the game was played in a Candaian city, but unplug your fingers from your ears, and hear me out. Like it or not, MLS is a soccer league mandated by FIFA through the US Soccer Federation. The game last night was an MLS exhibition. It was played in an MLS stadium. And where are the home offices of the league? Why in the US! So, it technically makes sense that the league who is presiding over the match and fielding a team plays the anthem of the country they are based out of, just as it makes sense that they play the anthem of the country where their opponents for the night, West Ham United, are based out of.
Whether or not you like it, MLS is not based in Canada. I mean, it's just not. Trust me, if it would get you all to stopp the incessant whining, I'd vote to move it there. But for now, of the 14 teams in the league, MLS has one team in Canada, and, after incidents like last night, some of us are starting to think that's one team too many.
But already, I can hear you chiding me, calling me a hater of Canada, a xenophobe, or God forbid, a Republican. Maybe that's deserved. But if you don't belive me, you can independently verify that my idea isn't insane, or at the very least, it's not unheard of to only play the anthems of the two teams involved in a game. Just watch the Barcalona - Chivas match that will be played at Soldier Field in Chicago in a few weeks. I can guarantee the two teams countries anthems will be played. But I wouldn't bet five bucks that the US anthem will be played, even though the event is taking place in the US. It would make no more sense to play the US anthem than it would for every nationality represented on the two sides to be played, since certainly not all Barca or Cheevus roster members are Spaniards and Mexicans.
For further observation, at a major league baseball game, do the play the Dominican Republic, Venezuela, or Korean national anthems? Oddly, they only play the songs of the home coutries of the two entities involved.
Toronto should be happy to be included in the proceedings, thrilled that MLS is honoring you with one of the league's focal point matches. Yet not only do you not appreciate this gesture of goodwill, Canadian soccer fan, you get pissy and throw a fit after 5 seconds of a perceived injustice at a game that is literally the biggest bone MLS can throw you. On top of that, if the fans could have waited for 5 minutes, they would have seen the league continue to bend over backwards to make their anthem the focal point of ESPN's opening TV coverage. With skin this thin, I'm not quite sure how you are going to react to getting bitch-slapped into giving up the rights for Brian McBride, but I can be fairly certain it will end with a lot of crying and people once again making exceptions for you. Kind of like the kid in school who poops his pants, but he's retarded, so it's OK.
Thankfully, when Columbus has one or two boneheads that do something backwards and ignorant (like utter a racist slur or fight), the rest of the world is disappointed because there is the perception that we ARE better than that. But Toronto? Hey, c'mon, don't blame them, it's not their fault. They live in Canada, where everyone has...what...a massive inferiority complex? Why does everyone make exceptions for you?
In closing, we all know you think you are MLS's saviors, the only fans who care about your team, the fans upon whom all other fans should gaze to glean from the wisdom dripping off your brows. But incidents like the one from last night only show how far many of you really have yet to go.
Free Health Care Causes Brain Loss.
Crewsing in Kansas City
The Columbus Crew jumped out to an early 1-0 lead and made it stand up, adding two more goals for the 3-0 drubbing of the Kansas City Wizards in KC. Chad Marshall got a goal off a corner (what a great idea!) in the 4th minute, and Alejandro Moreno added goals in the 20th and 67th to end the Crew's scoring drought in MLS matches, and put the Black and Gold back in the win column.
I don't have time to do an entire rundown (Father's Day, you know...), but here are a couple of quick thoughts:
- Man of the Match could be quite a few people, as the team overall played well last night. I'm giving it to Chad Marshall, as he scored the game winner, and provided outstanding defense once again in the back. As long as there are no more cobwebs, Chad should be getting some NT callups soon. Also, I wouldn't be surprised if he gets a coach's pick for the All-Star game.
- Alejandro Moreno had two very quality goals tonight. Of course, the first one came more because Kevin Hartman sucks, but the shot was still beautiful. Kudos to Danny O'Rourke for the nice pass on that goal. And the 2nd was pure class. If you watch the replay, Harmtan actually takes two looks to the near post to make sure he has it covered, and Moreno still beats him to that side.
- Emmanuel Ekpo showed more on defense than I expected, which is a good sign. He also did a very good job of linking up the field with our attackers, althought some of his passes in the offensive 3rd left something to be desired. And his footwork is something we haven't seen the likes of since Jeffro Cunningham.
- William Tecumseh Hesmer once again puts up the clean sheet, only this time, we score some goals for him. Good to see him on his game, and not having to save any PKs.
Scores from around the league:
- New England 2, Houston 0 (Thursday)
New England is on 26 points, so the Crew had to win tonight to keep pace.
- Toronto 3, Colorado 1
The Crew are still only two points ahead of the Canucks.
- DC 4, NYRB 1
Make no mistake, DC was never out of this race. It's a very long season, and they are only 10 points off the league lead.
- LA 3, SJ 0
Edson Buddle with a hat trick. Is there another blue moon out already?
- RSL 1, Chivas 0
Hooray mediocrity!
Today's big game:
Chicago at Dallas 3pm
Let's hope that the sister side of Dallas can do HSG a favor by kicking Chicago in the mouth, and keep the Crew firmly in 2nd place. A tie or loss for Chicago will leave Columbus in 2nd with a trip to LA next weekend.
Gameday Update: Crew Need the Fifth
Who is this guy? And why is he on the Crew blog? Read on...
Just wanted to take a quick look around the league as we get ready for the late nighter against San Jose. And as many Crew fans are planning on an easy win tonight, let's hope the team can get their fifth win in a row. DC did Columbus no favors on Thursday night, losing to the Fire 2-0. Thanks for that, Scum; the one time a Columbus fan might root for you, and you choke. No seriously, thanks.
Thanks to DC, the Crew have to keep winning to stay in front of the Chicago Fire. As good as the Crew have looked, that first game against Chicago will really let us know who is truly the class of the East. Granted, we're all pretty sure it's the Crew, but Chicago is having just as good of a start to the season.
So what else is going on besides the Crew kicking ass in San Jose? Glad you asked:
The FSC Overhyped Crapfest: Colorado at Houston (8:30pm FSC)
Houston is desperate for a win. Colorado has lost two out of three, but they did beat DC at home last week. Of course, beating DC is about as easy as convincing a 400-pound man to go with you to Hometown Buffet. Look for Houston to get that first win.
Prediction: Houston wins 3-1
The No-One-Cares Western Conference Game: Dallas at Real Salt Lake (9pm Direct Kick)
Does anyone else think Arturo Alvarez looks like Rod Stewart? Me neither...
Prediction: Dallas wins 2-0
That OTHER Late Night Game: NYRB at LA Galaxy (10:30pm HD Net)
Landon Donovan and David Beckham welcome JPA and Jozy Altidore to the HDC. Fortunately for the Galaxy, Abel Xavier is injured, so maybe Donovan won't have to score three goals for them to win. Then again, that begs the question "Who is worse": Abel Xavier, or the guy who can't beat out Abel Xavier for the starting job?
Prediction: NYRB win 3-2
The Interesting Sunday Game: New England at Chivas (3pm Sunday Telfutura)
Taylor Twellman is probable for the Revs, who have looked poor early this year. Chivas hasn't been much better. Still, both teams have quality, and if this matchup were to occur when the teams are at full strength, it's probably be a little more interesting.
Prediction: 2-2 draw
Of course, I'm pulling for NY and NE to lose, but against the West, it's not likely. You can't keep quality down.
Finally, on a completely unrelated note, the Big Soccer board had an interesting topic regarding things new Crew fans should know. It's quite interesting, and there's some good info on there for the noobs of Crew nation. My favorite part of the thread was this link: The Saga of Brad Fiedel
For those not in the know, the former U.S. National Team and currrent Blackburn Rovers keeper was named MLS Goalkeeper of the Year in 1997 as a member of the Crew. He was then sold to Liverpool for $1.7 million, and eventually landed in Blackburn, where he seen the team go from promotion to almost qualifying for Europe in his 8 years there. Friedel started a tradition of the Crew exporting talent oversees (see also: Brian McBride, Stern John, Marcos Gonzalez, etc...). And as much as I hate to say it, players like Robbie Rogers, Adam Moffat, and even Will Hesmer could have bright futures in Europe. But Friedel was the first Crew player to make a splash.
