It's been way too long without a minute of Crew soccer played, especially when the last match was a trainwreck. Granted, the trainwreck was facilitated by surfer suspensions, in-game injuries and the Chinese scheduling their Olympics right during the year the Crew are making their first playoff run in four years. Damn Commies.
On a quick sideriff here, have you listened to Bela Karoli, former US Women's Gymnastic coach, give his commentary on the games with Bob Costas? I think he would be a perfect replacement for Marcelo Balboa as the color commentator for Olympic Soccer. Sure he would have no idea what he's talking about, but neither does Balboa, and at least Karoli is tragically funny. Balboa is just tragic. Also, Karoli has had the balls to call out China for blatantly lying about the age of their gymnasts. I'll take that over Balboa's slobbering over every other team's athletes while skewering our own any day of the week.
Still, despite the drought of Crew action, that doesn't mean there aren't other things happening in MLS.
One of the big stories of the last two weeks is the firing/resignation of Alexi Lalas and Ruud Gullit, respectively. One was completely justified (Lalas) and one was really unnecessary (Gullit). How can anyone blame Gullit for the desparate state of affairs that Alexi Lalas was allowed to put the Galaxy in? Forget David Beckham's $5 million-a-year contract for a second. Alexi Lalas has spent AEG's money like, well, it was Real Madrid's. Landon Donovan's $900,000 contract is arguably worth it, but not at the expense of having 17 k-a-year guys playing defense and midfield. And let's not sweep Carlos Ruiz's ghastly $400,000 contract under the rug. Imagine if Sigi Schmid and Brian Bliss were allowed $1.3 million extra? We'd have a bonafide behemoth to go with Chad Marshall in the back, a true attacking mid to connect with Guille, a left back who could connect with Rodgers, and still have enough beer money for Sigi to buy all the German beer he wants. I honestly don't know if the Crew would need to spend it all. Instead, Lalas turned that money into two egotistical players, one who is having agreat season, and one who has been on the bench for most of it. And somehow, that's falling on Gullit. Makes no sense.
Cobi Jones is taking the reigns of coaching that mess out in L.A., but it seems like the moves are not getting any better. Rumors are now circulating, and appear to be confirmed, that L.A. has passed on returning defender Cory Gibbs in favor of returning midfielder Eddie Lewis in the allocation rankings. Fortunately for the Crew, Colorado snatched up Gibbs, keeping him from going to the Revs, who now hold the first allocation spot that would have belonged to the Crew. Of course the Revs appear to be wheeling and dealing, as Goff and others are reporting that Saprissa's Gabriel Badilla will be joining New England for the playoff push. He's a defender by the way.
On the Eddie Lewis thing, I guess they're thinking they'll win 6-5?
Meanwhile, there's still time in all of this for the Crew to make a move. I know, I know, Pat Noonan is here, Gino Padula appears to be practicing once again, and the Olympics will be over sooner than later, but the Crew still need to make another move, preferably for a back line defender who can play on the left (just in case, sorry Gino). And it's not just me saying that, but the ever-more-enjoyable Mike Arace from the Dispatch. According to Mitchell's article (first link in this paragraph), the Crew are trialing Brian Plotkin, formerly of the Chicago F*re, and are looking at a defender from Moldova who used to play in the Ukraine. And yes, those countries are neighboring, in case you went to public school. Don't know who it is, but there's good money in betting the nameplate will be sleeve to sleeve.
Regardless, those moves won't cut it. The Crew have until the 15th to make one more move, and I have to believe we can unload a couple of youngsters (a la Jed Zayner and Brad Evans) for a veteran stopper in the middle. After all, guys in your fantasy football league make bad trades once their season has tanked, and there are plenty of horrible decision makers in MLS (which many times does not attain the high standards of most FF leagues). Let's keep the faith that we can get a final piece on the cheap, and the Crew can make a run at the Supporter's Shield, the Cup, and stuffing it all in the face of Brian McBride.
MLS Crewsing
Morning Afterthoughts: Lack of Depth Sinks Crew
I really don't have much to say about the Crew's 2-0 loss on Saturday nightn, other than the obvious. The Crew lost because of poor finishing, poor defense, and a ton of players missing, due to callup, suspensions, and injury. With both teams at full stregth, I'm sure the Crew would have fared better. And yet, they could have tied or won that game, had they hit on a few of the sitters that were missed. Ah well.
The Good: Guille, Gaven, Peterson, Zayner, Moreno.
The Bad: Iro, Marshall's injury, Evans misses, Moreno's misses, Guille's misses.
I was going to say "Sigi's subs" here for not bringing on Garey until the 70th minute; but when two of your subs get burned due to injury, it throws the plan out the window.
The Ugly: How did Nate Jacqua stay on the field after this tackle?
Tell me how that is not a red card? Also tell me how he didn't get his 2nd yellow 10 minutes later when he hit Iro with his studs in the thigh a full second after the ball had been played? Meanwhile, Steve Lenhart watched and put his head in his hands.
But insted of belaboring the obvious, I want to change gears. The Crew are sitting at a weird point in the season. They are off for a week, then come back but won't be at full strength, unless the US and Nigeria can't make it out of their group stage at the Olympics. Then we play Dallas twice in three weeks (Houston and Dallas roadtrips in August? Gee, thanks MLS Scheduling Computer...) before heading into the most important stretch of our season, where the final nine of eleven games are against the Eastern Conference.
Menawhile, the transfer window for MLS closes on August 15th. Do the Crew need help? Should we trade someone? Splash some international cash? Kidnap Pat Noonan and drag him back to Columbus in Crew Cat's Van? And if any of that happens, who would the Crew be looking to replace?
Just for the heck of it, I'll list the positions, the players who play at each, and a percentage of confidence I have that the Crew cannot find someone who will perform better at their salary, thus showing us who is expendable. Of course, most of these salaries are guaranteed by now, so it's not like we can just cut someone and keep their money. Still, it's interesting to see what the Crew are getting for their money.
For example, I don't think we're going to find someone who will perform any better than Lenhart while being paid $12,900. It's the league minimum, so at best, we could maybe find someone as good as he is for that price. So I have 100% confidence we can do no better than Lenhart in his situation. Same goes for a high-salaried player like Guille, who has shown over the course of a year and a half that he is a leader and true engine on this team. We aren't going to find someone who is a guarantee to perform like he has been.
However, someone like Nico Hernandez, who was making 100k and riding the pine? Well I have little doubt the Crew can and in fact will do better than him before things are said and done, seeing as how they have already released him. But even when he was here, I know for sure I could do exactly what he did for $100,000: sit on my ass and barely make an impact when brought into the game.
Forwards (And Guille)
Guillermo Barros
Schelotto $375,000 - 100%
Alejandro Moreno $131,000 - 80%
Steven Lenhart $12,600 - 100%
Jason Garey $60,625 - 60%
Geroge Josten $12,600 - NA
I feel fairly confident of all of these guys. Though I note we could do better than Garey, that's mainly just because we have two guys (Rogers and Lenhart) who have performed better and make less money. I like his heart though as well as his ability he showed us in the Colorado game, and don't truly view him as expendable. Josten, since he's seen no time on the field, doesn't rate at all. But our forward situation, does not seem to be a problem area.
Midefield
Emmanuel Ekpo $123,000 - 70%
Robbie Rogers $57,500 - 99%
Eddie Gaven $165,000 - 40%
Brad Evans $33,000 - 80%
Brian Carrol $126,000 - 70%
Stefani Miglioranzi $84,200 - 70%
Duncan Oughton $75,000 - 30%
Andrew Peterson $12,900 - 90%
Cory Elenio $12,900 - NA
Kevin Burns $12,900 - NA
At $165,000 Gaven is always going to get looked at. I don't want to see us lose him, as he's only 21, and has looked good since coming back from injury. But for the purposes of this argument, $165,000 is an awful lot of money, and it seems as though for the money, there must be someone better than present-day Gaven. And in case you're wondering why Gaven gets paid so much, consider that the Crew are paying a contract negotiated between Gaven and the NY Red Bulls. The man in the Red Bulls FO who OK'd the deal? Alexi Lalas.
And yes, as much as we all love and respect the Kiwi, Duncan Oughton just flat out doesn't have it anymore. $75,000 could go a long way towards finding some help in a midfield that has truly missed Adam Moffat.
Defense
Chad Marshall $148,000 - 90%
Frankie Hejduk %175,000 - 70%
Andy Iro $53,500 - 70%
Danny O'Rourke $69,000 - 70%
Gino Padula $145,000 - 20%
Jed Zayner $43,800 - 60%
Ezra Hendrickson $72,000 - 10%
Ryan Junge $12,900 - 90%
Ryan Miller $12,900 - NA
If Gino could play left back, he's worth whatever we can pay him. But since he hasn't proven to be healthy yet, I don't know that we should be paying a guy that much to ice his knees. No one can predict an injury, of course, but the fact that he had only played in 6 games over a 2 year period might have tipped us off. And yes, for $72,000 I could buy a stack of bricks to set on the field that would play better defense than Ezra Hendrickson. You're telling me that the Crew couldn't spend that $210,000 on a sturdy anchor at center back?
Keeper
William Hesmer $70,000 - 100%
Andy Gruenenbaum $33,000 - 90%
Just for point of reference, San Jose is paying Joe Cannon $213,000 this season. Hell, Matt Reis is only making 160k! But for $70,000 the only two guys near that pay figure of any talent are John Busch ($80k) and Brad Guzan (was $103,000, but not anymore). So, yeah, I don't think we're going to find anyone better than William Hesmer for the money.
Out for season:
Adam Moffat $17,700 - 100%
Overall, this raises some interesting questions. The Crew are being fairly prudent, as Gaven seems to be the only overpaid player based on current performance. Next year, the Crew will most likely have to up the payout on guys like Rogers, Moffat, Hesmer, and maybe even Guille or Lenhart to keep them from leaving the fray. And while there has been talk of adding a Designated Player, how would that affect a guy like Guille? This is his team, and if a big name midfielder is brought in, I wonder how the new player would interact with our beloved Argentine.
Still, if there was ever a time to make a move, it's now, as the Crew have two weeks to get him acclimated into the system.
So what do you think? Want to see the Crew spend a lot of money now to add a final piece or two to the puzzle for this year, or leave that room for next year, and go into the playoffs with what we have?
Crew Looking at Nigerian Striker.
Finally, this much talked about mystery man from Africa has been nearly identified. I say nearly because on a blog from Shawn Mitchell today, a rough outline of who this guy is has been given:
Here's what I know so far about the Nigerian striker the Crew is attempting to bring in for a look-see: He is 25 and played in Israel for several years. He signed with a team in Romania last season but suffered a knee injury and did not play. I don't have a lot of time to devote to identifying this player right now, which is a required part of the game that is played when talk to turns to foreign acquisitions. Anybody up for the task?
Well, since you asked, I think it's Ibezito Ogbonna. From his Wikipedia page:
Ibezito Ogbonna (born March 27, 1983) (Age 25) is a Nigerian football player. After spending four seasons in Israel with Hapoel Tel Aviv, Ogbonna signed a two year contract with CFR Cluj in Romania
He only managed to play approximately 4 minutes for the Romanians though, suffering a serious injury early in the season that kept him on the sideline for a year. Ogbonna was recently released on a free by CFR Cluj and is currently looking for a new club.
I'd say we've found our man. As far as what he can do, here's a crappy highlight reel:
Looks like he can get on the end of setpieces and corners, and he's fast enough to outrun defenders. At least, Israeli league defenders. So we'll see how he does in Columbus.
Also, what are we calling him? "Zito"? "Oggy"? I vote for "Ibezzy"...
Dear John, Please Come Home
Seems like every week, we're trying to figure out who would look good as the next addition to the Black and Gold. This pastime becomes more frequent and necessary when the team starts losing, especially in the horrible fashion we lost last week to the Quakes. Last year, rumors of Riquelme and Palermo made us dreamers. More recently, Zurawski, Podolski, and "mythical Romanian midfielder" have made us swoon. Even a few weeks ago, there were ethereal fantasies of Brian "No, really, I still like you..." McBride coming to Columbus.
Funny that no one really was thinking this way when we were winning 6 out of the first 7.
Personally, I have posited only one name into this argument of who the Crew should go after, and that's this guy. I feel that rampant speculation and wishing only leads to more heartbreak when the seemingly impossible proves to be, in fact, impossible. But would you believe I think the Crew have a legitimate shot at a true scoring threat who had 19 goals in England last season and who has 67 goals in just over 100 caps for his national team? Believe it or not, the Crew not only have a shot at him, they already have a locker nameplate for him.
Ladies and gentlemen, the man of the hour, the person we should all be lobbying Mark McCullers, Sigi Schmid, and Brian Bliss to sign as our designated player, is named John.
Stern John.
Fresh off stints in Southampton, Sunderland, and Birmingham City, John is not an offensive-minded midfielder, or a wing-mid, or a two-way player who will get you 6-7 goals. Stern John is a true forward, nay....a STRIKER. Yes, striker. A player who really only cares about scoring, who comes to the park everyday knowing the reason he is on the team is to score goals. Believe it or not, some teams actually have these guys. And Stern John not only knows how to score, he scores in ways that absolutely demolish the other team. He gets hat tricks in the 2nd half. He scores in stoppage time. Consistently, when the team needs a goal, he finds a way to tickle the twine.
Now, before we get much further into this, I know this type of signing would darn near force Sigi into playing with two forwards, which apparently he hates to do. I can only guess he hates this approach, seeing as how we have a whole dive team of forwards sitting on the bench while Moreno gets hammered all alone at the top of the box. So to make this work for Sigi, we would need to only refer to him as "the Crew's new scoring-oriented D-mid who happens to only play in the offensive third."
Some older Crew fans know all too well what Stern John can do, because he did it here in Columbus first. In 1998, John had 26 goals for the Crew, including 7 multi-goal games. He followed it up the next year by christening the Crew Stadium grounds with 18 more goals. All in all, he had 44 goals in 55 appearances with the Black and Gold. By the way, that's two fewer games played than Eddie Gaven had at the start of this season, but 35 more goals than Gaven has for the Crew. Warrants mentioning.
If you never saw him in a Crew kit, here's one of John's masterpieces from that opening season in the House That Lamar Built:
Things I loved about this goal, which was similar to many of the goals he scored for Columbus:
- It turned zero points into one (actually three, because the Crew won that game in a shootout, back when in MLS had the "let's try to hook non-soccer fans" rules, which also included the running-down clock.) Stern John has scored clutch goals throughout his career.
- It got the entire stadium off their feet and jumping. Old people, young people, crippled people...everyone was going nuts when he hit that shot home. His goals mesmerized those crowds back in the day.
- It ripped the heart out of the opposing team. Even the broadcasters, who were San Jose locals, couldn't hide the anguish. And Joe Cannon (yes, the SAME Joe Cannon) laying prostrate on the ground will forever be burned into my gray matter.
- It was done with a cocky swagger. Stern John isn't going to out-hustle Frankie Hejduk, or out-think Brian Carrol. No, Stern John is going stand around, not track back, get caught offside, and argue with the refs. He's also going to have his collar popped, beat you with a disgusting, "I can't believe I just saw that!"-type of play, and then rip his shirt off or flex his muscles. If it were a country song, Stern John would have slept with your girlfriend, stole your dog and your truck, and even cut the strings on your guitar.
Granted, the legend of Stern John was built when he was much younger. He was 22 and 23 during his two seasons with the Crew. Still, he did just have 19 goals for a side that nearly got relegated from the Championship. Apparently, even if there isn't talent around him, he can get his goals. Also, no matter how old you get, you can't unlearn shots like this one, from 2006:
OK, so now that I've whet your appetite for the "A+" T&T forward, you're asking "How good of a shot do we have of getting him?" Well that depends on a few things, one of which we know, one we don't, and one we can reasonably surmise.
What we don't know: Does anyone in the Crew F.O. even know that this guy is still playing? Outside of Bob Rifle and Mike Lapper, I wouldn't be shocked if Sigi or McCullers scratch their heads at the mention of his name. And, I say this in the most literal sense, only God Himself knows if HSG would care to sign him for more than a couple of large Pizza Hut Pizzas even if the Crew want him.
Bottom line: We don't know what the Crew F.O. is thinking, so let's not get our hopes up just yet. But, to carry the discussion along further, let's pretend they are interested in John.
What we do know: He's going to be available, for the right price. Southampton, John's current team, is under new management. Nigel Pearson was relieved of his coaching duties and replaced by former Dutch National Teamer Jan Poortvliet, whose last name sounds like a French toilet. Typically, when there is a new coach in town, especially in Jolly Old Ingerland, they like to bring in the new blood along with the new coach. Plus, this statement from the board of Southampton may be intriguing as well:
"...The board have been looking closely at the situation on the playing side of the club whereby we are inevitably going to have to depend to a large extent on the quality of our youngsters in the academy and the reserve team. "
Not exactly a vote of confidence in the current roster, of which John is a part. And of course, we're not implying that he's gone, but if the Crew want to make an offer, you can bet Southampton would be listening. He's not young, but certainly not old, as he won't turn 32 until October of this year.
Bottom line: If you're looking to rebuild, 31 is not the age to start with. However, if you're looking for a seasoned goal scorer to ignite an already potent attack (assuming everyone is healthy), then 31 is just fine.
What we can surmise: If John was to leave England, he would want to play in Columbus. Think about it:
- He'd be closer to his family in the States and National Team in Trinidad and Tobago.
- He could make bank as a DP.
- He's 19 goals away from becoming the all-time leading goal scorer for the Crew.
- He still knows people here, and would get to work with some of his old teammates.
- He could win a championship.
Bottom Line: If John were to consider another go in MLS, Columbus would be perfect for him.
Will we get him? Who knows. But if the Crew don't sign a DP this offseason, it won't be because the Crew Nation is short on ideas.
Past, Present, and Crewture Tense...I Told You So!
By Smitty
On October 16th of 2007, on a Big Soccer thread entitled "Wishful Thinking" on the Crew forum, I posted the following comments in response to the idea of the Crew's ability to obtain Riquelme as our Designated Player:
Since we're in the wishful thinking category, what about German Denis? Here are the basics:
15 goals in the 13 games so far in the Apertura this year playing for Independiente. Also, he just got a call up to the Argentine National team.
(Note: This isn't the original vid I posted, as the one I used has been removed. Still, here are all 18 goals he ended up scoring last season.)
His Wikipedia page for further info...
Normally, I would say he's out of our league. But...
-He's 26, so he's not "old", but not a young prodigy. Could be a Juan Pablo Angel type player.
- He's already done the Europe thing.
- We have GBS, and thus, maybe, an "in".
Plus, he's a "German", so Sigi wouldn't have any problems...
The Crew have made no announcements regarding signing this player. BUT today they annouced the team we are playing in our first exhibition match. Yeah, it's none other than Independiente, a legendary club in South America. More importantly, it's the home of one German Denis.
Now consider that Brian Bliss just got on a plane today headed to "Brazil" (suuuuure...) to scout some players. Make no bones about it, I know what I'm talking about. Here's my step-by-step prediction of what's going to happen:
1. Bliss is putting up a smoke screen about Brazil. He'll make one or two stops, grab a cab in the middle of the night and head for Argentina.
2. The whole reason Bliss is in South America is to pitch German Denis on taking over the reigns once GBS hangs up the boots after this season.
3. The Crew can afford Denis because of the money they're not going to be spending on McBride (more on that in a moment), and the money they'll save once Guille walks away next year.
4. Independiente come to Columbus and allow Denis to get one good runout in front of Mark and the Fat Man against competition both will know well (The Crew).
5. Denis rips off his Independiente kit after the game, revealing a fresh #20 Banana kit that he took from the soon-to-be-released Nico Hernandez, and immediately has a press conference at the center circle in front of all the Argentine fans who came out to the match to see him.
- Denis becomes the perfect point man to finish all those beautiful crosses being sent in by Robbie Rogers, Frankie Hejduk, and Guillermo.
- The Crew beat L.A. 5-0 in the MLS Cup and get a taste of double, also swiping the U.S. Open Cup.
- Denis gets a hat trick in two seperate playoff games.
- Everyone buys me beer for calling this situation a whole year ago.
Just saying, don't be shocked when I'm right.
In other Crew news...
- Brian McBride has stated he's leaving Fulham. Wishful Crew fans are hoping it's to come back to the Black and Gold, but I have news for you: He's not. McBride will most likely end up with the Fire or Toronto, but Chicago does not have a DP, so it'll be interesting to see what they give up to get him. Still, McBride's agent and brother Matt is doing some PR, saying that McBride will always love Columbus, regardles of where he ends up. That means it won't be Columbus folks. He wouldn't have to tell us he loves us if he wasn't going somewhere else.
- Channel 6 did a story on the Youtube video last night. Thus continuing this douchebag's 15 minutes of "in"fame..
- I'll be posting my Silly Game Preview before Friday is out.
